


oh my gods! (and a whole bunch of goddesses)

by lostinhellfire



Category: The Almighty Johnsons
Genre: Abduction, Gen, Goddesses, a lot of norse mythology, anders!angst, at least i hope so, brothers being asses to each other, gay deities, most of them oc, no mary-sues, possibly spoilery for season 3, the actual plot is starting now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-16
Updated: 2013-08-15
Packaged: 2017-12-20 09:41:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/885771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostinhellfire/pseuds/lostinhellfire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Johnsons have a whole bunch of problems. Starting with runaway-girlfriends and banished brothers.<br/>What if we add a few goddesses to the mix? Will it turn to the better or the worse?</p><p>Full of brotherly problems, OC, norse mythology, a load of my personal headcanons and Anders-angsting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A family of gods

**Author's Note:**

> This is my take on what should happen after 3x02, so it's AU after that episode.  
> There'll be some OC, but I'll try not to make it too much about them. I only needed a few characters aside from the Canon ones calling the Johnsons onto their shit.  
> Also their might be a bit Anders-bashing in the beginning, because Axl hates his guts right now, but I swear, he'll get his retribution later on. I just love some Anders!angst....  
> Also note that this is my very first fanfic and English is not exactly my first language, so please, don't be too harsh on me :)

Ingrid sighed and hid her face in her hands. The last few day hadn’t been easy for any of them.  
Gaia leaving had unlocked a new side in Axl starting with Anders’ banishment.  
Axl decided, that he didn’t want the ‘defiler’ of his (ex-)girlfriend around anymore and declared him no longer part of this family  
To Ingrid’s surprise nobody protested against this divine order, not even Ty who had argued, that some time away from each other would do both Anders and Axl good.  
After getting rid of his traitorous brother Axl initiated phase 2 of the hunt for Frigg. Now that Gaia had turned into Idunn there had to be another girl who served as a host for Odin’s wife.  
That’s where Ingrid’s job began.  
For the past three days she had been searching all kinds of databases for families who had been on the same ship as their ancestors.  
Ty had been so kind to make her coffee whenever she was in need of one, but none of the other Johnsons was helping her with the seemingly never-ending search for norse families in New-Zealand. They preferred to search the local bars and clubs, as if Frigg was some kind of stripper who just waited for Axl as if he were Richard Gere.  
Ingrid sighed anew and massaged her temples. Just ten more minutes of work, then she’d ask Ty for another shot of caffeine and maybe a cupcake to lighten her mood. One always works better when in a good mood.  
On a whim she decided to search a local website for families who had just moved to Auckland.  
It turned out to be a divine impulse as she stumbled over a familiar name.  
She checked a list with known families which had been on that boat and nearly squealed.  
“Let’s find out where you live, family Belgarsson.”

\---

The Belgarssons were a family of four who had just moved from Germany to New-Zealand.  
Their ancestors had been on the same ship as the Johnson-ancestors, they were all female and the best: one of them had turned 21 just a few days ago.  
After meeting up with the entire group, except Anders, at Mike’s ruin of a bar, they decided to waste no time and visit them immediately.  
Michelle, as the only voice of reason, argued, that marching up to their front porch and demanding to know their divine identities was not the best idea to make a good first impression.  
So they made Ingrid find out where the Belgarssons worked. Luckily one of them worked at a bar in Auckland, which made the whole company marching there way less awkward.  
“A goddess working in a bar? Bad memories”, muttered Ty as they entered said bar.  
Axl ignored him and asked: “So, which one of them is a goddess?” Gaia leaving had the bad side-effect of turning Axl into Mr. Serious-and-straight-to-business.  
“I don’t know, could be any of the girls.”, answered Ingrid. “Maybe Olaf could identify her by her smell?”  
“No. There will be no sniffing on poor girls. And there will also be no ‘Hello, my name is Odin. Do you happen to be my Frigg?’”  
“Yes, thank you Mike, for having such faith in me.”, Axl mumbled and moved towards the barmaid.  
“Where are you going?”  
“Well, we’ll have to start somewhere, don’t we?”, he snapped and didn’t pay his companions any more attention. He was in dire need of a drink and if this drink led him to Frigg and o forgetting his (ex-)girlfriend, even better.  
He sat down in front of the barmaid and waited for her to acknowledge his existence.  
“What’s with the grumpy face?”, she asked after taking his order.  
“Just lost my girlfriend to my brother”  
He hadn’t planned to be so forward with the girl, but something compelled him to tell her his story.  
“Ouch.” She said and grimaced while she gave him his drink.  
“Yeah, ‘ouch’”  
He was just sipping at his drink, when the girl said “But who in the nine realms could snatch a woman away from Odin?!” which led him to spit his drink over the entire counter.  
“What?!”  
“Oh come on. Let’s be honest, what could lead a bunch of gods into a bar aside from looking for the goddess who works there?”  
Axl wiped his mouth and stared at her, desperately trying to find something to answer and settled for a stuttered “yes.”  
She smiled.  
“Good. I know, that you are Odin, so you surely want to know, who I am. My name is Saga, which is also the name of the goddess possessing me.”  
A period of silence followed.  
“I take it you don’t know who Saga is?”  
Axl nodded.  
“Well, aside from being something like a personal bartender to Odin, she is also a goddess of poetry, all things spoken, history and knowledge.”  
“Ah, so that’s why you knew I am Odin. Can you read minds or something?”  
She laughed. “No, I just have a brilliant intuition and I know a lot of shit. Now, your entourage has been staring at us for the past five minutes and I’m convinced, that deceptively young man is trying to smell me from back there.”  
Axl turned and caught his grandfather sniffing a passing girl.  
“Ah, yes. I’ll better go and tell them who you are.” He’d have to whack Olaf for being embarrassing.

\---

“’Saga, goddess of poetry and everything spoken’ you say?” Olaf said while nursing the bump he had gotten from his grandson.  
“What, like a female Anders?” Stacy frowned.  
“No”, Olaf shook his head quickly, Axl tended to overreact when his asshole-brother was mentioned. “Her powers are different. The last Saga I knew wasn’t able to make people do things just by telling them so. She had telepathy-like powers and everyone thought she could read minds, but that’s not true. Saga is just very good at reading the vibes she get’s from other people.”  
“Yeah, again for non-stoners, please?”  
Olaf frowned. He wasn’t even that high. “She has good people-skills and knows a lot of shit. Back then we called her the goddess of gossip.”  
“So, is she useful?”  
Ty frowned. When had his little brother started to rate people by their usefulness?  
“People-skills? Knowing a lot of god-shit? Immediately knowing when somebody is a god? Yeah, that sounds pretty fucking useful!” Mike argued  
“I’d like to have someone on my side who actually has their shit together.” Michelle murmured, side-eyeing Ingrid and Olaf, who huffed indignantly.  
“Let’s not forget her three sisters! Who knows, maybe Frigg is one of them?”  
“Ingrid has a point, go back and try to find out more about her sisters!”  
Axl nodded and returned to the counter and sat down in front of Saga.  
“So, when do you want to meet my family?”  
“It’s really fucking creepy when you do that.”  
“Sorry. But that was kinda obvious. So, when?”  
“As soon as possible.”


	2. Another family of gods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit of Anders and meet Saga's family.

Being a mortal with divine powers is hard. Even harder is suddenly finding yourself without these powers.  
Banishing Anders from the Johnson family included him losing his godly powers, a rather harsh loss to a pr-guy.  
Anders sat at his desk and didn’t know what to do.  
In the past 2 days he had lost at least three clients, because he didn’t have Bragi’s powers to convince them to stay.  
Also his creativity suffered from withdrawal. All in all it had been a shitty few days.  
Even Dawn had noticed something. She had been asking him if he wasn’t sleeping well or if something happened, apparently even his acting skills were affected, because he couldn’t convince her, that everything was alright and she had been shooting him worried glances all day.  
Two hours later he couldn’t take it anymore.  
“Dawn, I’m leaving. Apparently I’m not able to do anything productive today, which is why I’m going to find myself some chick now.” Which was a lie, he’d go home and bury himself in booze.  
Dawn didn’t even shoot him a nasty glare and just said something about getting a good nightful of sleep. Man, he must have looked awful.  
While driving home he suddenly thought about what would happen, if he were to have an accident.  
Dawn was his emergency-contact and, as far as he knew, she didn’t have Ty’s phone number anymore. Would his family even notice, if he was in a coma for several months? Would they even care?  
Another bad side-effect of not having Bragi anymore was that he couldn’t even lie to himself anymore.

\---

Axl returned to Saga’s bar the next day.  
Saga immediately waved him over to the counter, where he saw three other women.  
By now it became clear, that Saga’s fiery red hair was dyed, because all her sisters had blonde hair.  
“Hey Axl. I’m glad you could come. Let me quickly introduce you to my sisters, they haven’t got much time.”  
Saga started with the oldest sister, Liza.  
“Her goddess is Syn, the goddess of legal defence and she herself is a lawyer! Talk about people being influenced by their gods…” That earned her a sharp glare from her sister. She wore a tight ponytail and a very formal suit. Axl felt as if her glaring eyes could pierce him.  
She held out her hand for him to shake it and he was surprised by how tight she gripped his. Apparently no woman to mess with.  
“Aaand to your right is the second eldest sister, Gritta and her goddess is Thrud, the daughter of Thor and overall a pretty fierce goddess.”  
Axl thought that ‘fierce’ was putting it very simple. The moment Saga mentioned Thor, he knew whom Gritta reminded him of. She had impossibly wide shoulders and her arms were heavily muscled. She was a lot thinner that Thor, but her face spoke of a similar single-mindedness. And her handshake was even more brutal than Liza’s.  
“And over here is my younger sister Sandra. She only turned 21 four days ago and her goddess is Sigyn, Loki’s wife.”  
Axl spat out what he was drinking, when he heard Loki’s name.  
“Loki?!”  
Hearing her god-husband’s name, Sandra looked up. She looked very young and her blonde hair fell in waves down her back.  
“You know him?” she whispered.  
“Know him? Damn well I do know that asshole! He tried to kill my brother once!”  
Sandra completely ignored what he said and seemed utterly lost in her own world, thinking of her darling Loki.  
Saga cleared her throat and looked at her sisters. “Well, now that everyone knows each other, you can leave.” Which they did pretty hurriedly. Saga hadn’t lied about them being busy.  
“Well, now you know my sisters, tell me something about your family.”  
“Well my oldest brother is Mike, his god is Ullr. He looked after m and my brothers after my mother and father left. He also owns a bar, but it isn’t opened right now. Then there’s Olaf, my grandpa. Up to my 21st birthday I was told, that he is actually my cousin, because he looks so young. That’s because his god, Balder, keeps him from aging. And then there’s Ty, he used to be Hodr, but he kind of managed to get rid of his god, so he is mortal now. Other gods I know are Sjofn, Mike’s girlfriend, Fulla, Snotra, Loki and Thor. We also knew Hel and Freya, but they died. Oh, and we know Idunn…”  
Saga nodded at each name, apparently she knew a lot more about god-shit than he did.  
“And what about the brother that stole your girlfriend?”  
Axl’s face darkened immediately. “He doesn’t matter.”  
Saga knew, that this was probably a sensitive matter, so she didn’t bother to ask further questions.  
After saying nothing for a while Axl asked: “Hey, I know the name of your goddess, but I don’t even know your real name. What is your name?”  
Saga smiled. “Saga is my name.”  
Axl looked confused. “…how?”  
“To understand that you have to know, that my grandmother was Wyrd.”  
“Your grandmother was weird?”  
Saga started laughing. “Not weird. Wyrd. One of the Norns.”  
Axl still looked confused.  
“The Norns are like the Moirae or Fates of Norse mythology. They influence fate. And by calling me Saga, my grandma basically invoked her to possess me.”  
“Ah, Saga possessed you, because you are called Saga?”  
“Yes, but that only worked, because my grandmother was a Norn.”  
“And what about your mother?”  
“She wasn’t one of the Norns. She was Eir, goddess of healing, but very feminist. She was convinced that no man could be suited to become a healer and she never kept a man for long. I suspect each of my sisters is from a different father.”  
“Wait, your mother was Eir? So she got rid of her goddess? Like my brother?”  
Saga’s smile died. “No. About a year ago my grandmother said to me, that she had to leave, because she’d only mess with fate if she stayed. She took her two sisters and my mother with her. The police still think they can be found, but I just know that they’re gone. A month ago I had this feeling that I had to be somewhere else, so I got my map of the world and ran around the table and let my finger wander over the map. It landed here, on New-Zealand.”  
Axl snorted. “That sounds pretty stupid.”  
“It was, I knocked at least three chairs over. But my grandmother always told me to follow my instinct and who knows? Maybe I have a role to play in Auckland?”  
Axl grinned. “Yeah, who knows?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I didn't confuse anyone with this god-shit :D  
> I'll try to update regularly, but I can't promise anything. I have a rough concept of the story, but I can never know, when my muse will leave me.


	3. Divine order

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saga explains Norse stuff for Axl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, there is a lot of made-up stuff going on in this chapter. I'm letting Saga explain how I think this whole 'being host for a god'-ting works. Note that nothing of this is canon! I'm just trying to make sense out of everything.  
> I'll try to integrate future episodes into the story, but remember that it's technically au after episode 3x02.  
> also there is a lot of swearing going on in this chapter. Axl just has a lot of feels.  
> I promise more Anders in the next chapter.

Several weeks had passed.  
The search for Frigg wasn’t going very well.  
They had agreed on the following procedure: Axl would pick up random girls, invite them to the bar Saga worked at and she would tell him if they possessed any spark of Norse holiness. Which they, without exception, hadn’t. This way of handling the search for Frigg seemed increasingly pointless.  
“You know” Saga said after Axl had dumped another Not-Frigg “It’s painfully obvious, that you don’t even want to find Frigg.”  
Axl frowned and acted as if he didn’t even know what the bartender was talking about.  
“This whole effort is pretty fucking useless, if you still aren’t over your ex-girlfriend. Which, let’s be honest, you’ll apparently never be.”  
“Yeah, it’s easy for you to say that. It’s not like you have your true love somewhere out there and you know that it’s not the one you love. Which is fucking confusing by the way.”  
Axl knew he was overreacting, but he was convinced that he had every right to. After all he had to find his bloody soulmate to forget his ex-girlfriend, whom he wasn’t even sure he wanted to forget. If only his stupid brother could have kept his stupid fucking pants on for once.  
Saga looked at Axl for a long time before saying something.  
“You do know, that you and Odin aren’t the same person, do you?”  
Axl groaned. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He really wasn’t in the mood for one of her incredibly dry tirades about Norse mythology and shit.  
Saga continued as if she didn’t notice his unwillingness.  
“You and Odin aren’t the same person. You are not Odin.”  
That’s when Axl started listening. “Um, yes we are? Which part of me being the living reincarnation of the Norse boss-god didn’t you get?”   
“See, that’s were you are wrong. You aren’t the reincarnation of Odin. Odin’s spirit resides inside you. You are separate beings. I thought you understood back when your brother got rid of his god. It’s a bit like removing the appendix, really.”  
Axl stared at her. What the hell was she even going on about. “Your point being?”  
Saga sighed and Axl got even more pissed. Not everyone could be the goddess of knowing useless bullshit.  
Saga pulled out a napkin and a pencil and scribbled two circles on the napkin. One she labelled ‘human’ and the other ‘god’.  
“You see, a god and their host are two coexisting beings. Not the same. The deity can influence the human, for example by lending different abilities like a super-brain.” She smiled smugly and drew a few arrows from the ‘god’-bubble to the ‘human’-bubble.  
Axl still didn’t know, why she was explaining all of this, but decided to listen.  
“So it’s entirely logical, that while Odin longs for his Frigg, you are still longing for you…. I don’t even know her name yet.”  
“Gaia, her name’s Gaia.”  
“Your Gaia.”  
Axl let it sink in. “So that means I’ll still ‘long’ for Gaia, even after I’ve found the Frigg?”  
Saga grimaced. “That’s where it’s becoming complicated. You see, if two godly soul-mates meet, both of the deities get an… you could call it a power-up. The gods get more powerful and start claiming parts of the human’s personality.”  
“So will I continue to long for Gaia or won’t I?”  
Saga bit her lip. “That depends on how much you are prepared to let Odin take from you. You see, while there are hosts that are entirely apart from their gods, there are others who fully embrace them. Take my sister Gritta. She was a fitness fanatic even before Thrud entered her.”  
Axl grimaced. The thought of something entering Gritta wasn’t even a bit entertaining.  
“But after her 21st she turned into this insane muscle-packet and got really fierce and everything. Thrud’s powers appealed to her, so she let the goddess fill her up. Major reasons for embracing a gods essence are wanting their powers and also a bit of insecurity.”  
Axl grimaced again. He had stopped listening after Saga mentioned something filling up Gritta. Another unwanted picture.  
He was so caught up in getting rid of this fantasy that he didn’t even notice that Saga had finished.  
He kept silent for a while until he decided to ask something, that he had wanted to know since his 21st birthday.  
“Do you know why a god chooses a specific person for their host?”  
Saga seemed to think about it for quite some time.  
“No. That whole system seems to be incredibly random. I can’t surely say what makes them go to a specific person. Often it’s because the human’s personality fits them, like my sister Liza. She had been a lie detector since for ever, so naturally she got the goddess of finding out the truth. Then there are gods who answered to a desire within their human. Like my sister Gritta’s wish to always grow physically stronger. There are also cases like mine, where a specific deity was summoned. Then there can be prophecies of a god returning to earth. And then there are accidents like your brother Ty. Tell me, what about your sweet, cupcake-baking sunshine of a brother reminds you of cold and ice?”  
Axl snorted before he became serious again. “And what about Gaia? She should have become Frigg, why did she get Idunn?”  
“Hm, see, there’s also the case of the ‘force of circumstance’. I get that the former Idunn was murdered right before Gaia’s ceremony?”  
Axl nodded.  
“Well, Idunn is a special goddess. Her apples keep the gods young and immortal. She is a constant goddess, because when there is no Idunn around and one of the other gods die, that god won’t be able to return to another host and vanish forever. That’s why it is crucially important that there is an Idunn alive at all times. All other goddesses have to step back in order to defer to her because she guarantees the survival of the gods.”  
Axl brooded again. Knowing why it had happened still didn’t make it right.  
In a moment of daredevilry Saga decided to say what should have been said weeks ago.  
“That’s why all of this isn’t your brother’s fault.”  
The effect was instant.  
Axl’s face darkened abruptly and he hissed: “Are you trying to defend him, or what?”  
Realising her mistake Saga immediately tried to calm him, but to no avail.  
“I don’t need anyone trying to excuse that dickwad’s actions! He fucking slept with my girlfriend! He doesn’t deserve being defended!”  
He stormed out after slamming far to little money on the counter.


	4. An unexpected revelation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders makes an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, this'll be very AU, because I don't think, that I'll be able to integrate future episodes.  
> Also the real plot with anders!angsting will start soon, don't worry :)

Axl came to Saga’s bar the following day as if nothing had happened.  
Saga was glad that Axl didn’t seem to be angry at her, so she chose not to mention anything concerning their previous conversation.  
Axl had stopped bringing potential Friggs to Saga’s bar and instead updated her on what was going on with the other Johnsons.  
“So one of your brothers is renovating his bar and the other’s house was burned down? How the hell did that happen?”  
Axl proceeded to tell her everything about Loki, his daughter Hel and the ill-fated wedding with his brother Ty.  
Saga said nothing for a while.  
“Loki sounds like a massive tosser.” Was what she murmured. Axl abruptly remembered, that one of her sisters was going to be Loki’s beloved.  
“I’m sorry. Sucks for your sister.”  
Saga nodded. “You know, before her 21st she was this incredibly independent yong woman. She wanted to be a journalist, travel around the world, write about injustice and all that… And now she’s just this silent, tame little housewifey girl, who’s just talking about finally meeting her beloved. I guess sometimes the gods are just incredibly dumb when they chose their hosts.”  
“Tell me about it.”

\---

Nothing eventful happened for several days. Ty had found a place of his own and started working for Stacey, Mike continued to work on his bar and Axl somehow managed not to fail his course.  
Then one night, Axl was, as usual, preventing saga from tending to her other customers, Anders entered the bar.  
Axl cursed rather colourfully and turned his back on him.  
“See that guy? The one who just entered?”  
Saga looked behind Axl. “You mean suit-guy.”  
Axl nodded. “Yeah that one.”  
“What about him?”  
“That’s my brother.”  
Saga looked confused before her face lightened up. “Oh THAT brother!”  
“Yeah that one. What the hell is he doing here?”  
“Well he can’t exactly go to your brother’s bar, can he?”  
Axl grimaced at her. She was awfully close to defending him. Again. As if he deserved being defended.  
Saga got up and started walking over to Anders when Axl hissed “What the hell are you doing?”  
“Taking his order. He’s a customer like everybody else, I can’t just not take his order because he slept with your girlfriend.”  
Axl’s face darkened, but he said nothing more.  
Saga went over to Axl’s brother’s table and asked him what he wanted, not even trying to sound welcoming. After all he did sleep with one of her friends’ girlfriend.  
From his seat Axl tried combusting his traitorous brother with sheer power of mind. His mere presence shot an electric feeling through Axl’s body.  
Apparently also feeling the static, Anders looked up and met his brother’s eyes for a moment. He looked away quickly and left rather hurriedly, without even waiting for Saga to bring him his drink.  
“Well, that wasn’t what I expected.” Saga sat down at Axl’s table, still staring at the door through which Anders had left.  
“What? I bet you thought he’d be taller. He’s really tiny. Dwarfish.” Axl cackled as if he’d made joke that was actually hilarious.  
Saga shot him a dirty look “That wasn’t what I meant. According to your description I was expecting a… predator of sorts. Someone who actually likes banging his brother’s girlfriend.”  
“Oh believe me. He liked it, even told me so.”  
“Then why do I get such a… hollow feeling in his presence? He doesn’t seem very pleased with himself.”  
Axl grinned “Well, that might be ‘cause I banned his god.”  
Saga looked moderately shocked. “You banned Bragi? That explains a certain lack of douchiness…”  
“He’s douchy enough even without the god of douches within him.”  
Saga shook her head and glanced back to the door. “No, that’s not the feeling he gave me. He gave me this very strange vibe, like he’s sad and alone.”  
Axl snorted “Probably doesn’t get laid enough without Bragi’s magic words of coercion.”  
He smiled a cruel smile to himself. Every joke on his dick-brother was a good joke. He looked up and saw that saga was giving him a funny look.  
“What?”  
“You didn’t tell me, that… No, you probably didn’t even know yourself.”  
“Know what?”  
Saga looked mildly uncomfortable. “I don’t know, whether I’m supposed to tell you that, if you don’t already know. It’s kinda private.”  
Now she had Axl’s entire attention. A secret about Anders? Something private and possibly really embarrassing? Just what he needed to save his day.  
He used his commanding Odin-voice “Tell me.”  
Saga bit her lip. “Did you know, that your brother is... gay?”  
Axl was silent for quite some time before he started laughing so hard, that people on other tables shot him dirty looks and mumbled unfriendly things.  
When he finally finished laughing he had to wipe some tears from his eyes before noticing Saga’s seething glare.  
“And what in the name of the gods is so funny about being gay?”  
“Nothing, it’s not about being gay, it’s about ANDERS being gay. That’s just ridiculous.”  
“And why is that?”  
“Haven’t you been listening to me? My brother is the biggest womanizer I’ve ever met. He slept with more girls than I’ve met! He could never be gay!”  
“Haven’t YOU been listening to ME? What did I tell you about a god’s influence over his host? Sometimes a host can’t control these influences! Bragi happens to be the biggest womanizer in the Norse pantheon, of course your brother would have to adapt!”  
Axl till didn’t believe her “Are you sure?”  
“My gay-dar is impeccable. Although I’m not sure, if he has admitted his homosexuality to himself. That’s probably why it was so easy for Bragi to influence him. People with self-esteem issues are easy targets…” She seemed to be mostly talking to herself now. “Ugh, the thought of having to sleep with men with my inner self revolting against it...” She shuddered.  
Axl flabbergasted. “You- You’re… You’re gay?”  
“What?! Got a problem with that? Did this destroy your image of me?” Saga snapped back.  
“What?! Wowowowo, stop! No, definitely no problem! There’s no problem with you being gay, I just… didn’t expect it…”  
Saga grinned sheepishly. “Sorry, I probably sounded like one of those militant gay-rights fascists who hate every hetero being. It’s a reflex.”  
Axl chuckled. “It’s all right, I understand. But that part about my ladykiller-brother being gay still doesn’t sound right.”  
“I’ll remind you that with me being gay and having the goddess Saga in me, I got the world’s best gay-dar. So you can believe me when I tell you: your brother isn’t straighter than Neil Patrick Harris!”  
Axl spat his beer everywhere. “My brother is one thing, but Barney?!”  
“Dude, where have you been living?”


	5. The words are gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It takes Colin Gundersen to make the Johnsons think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't updated this for quite some time. Sorry sorry sorry :/  
> this is where the actual plot starts XD  
> You'll notice some discrepancies from canon. For example, axl still failed his course (Bragi isn't around to talk him out of it) and Stacey hasn't told the others about her investigations yet.

It was Colin of all people who finally made them worry about Anders.  
Three weeks had gone by since Anders accidently stumbled into Saga’s bar. Mike still hadn’t finished his bar and, to noone’s surprise, Lance and Dawn had broken up after she caught him flirting with Ty. When Ty tried to cheer her up by bringing her cupcakes he ended up with one of the cupcakes in his face and the very clear message that Dawn wanted to be left alone.  
Even Axl didn’t have a moment spare to hate Anders as he had managed to fail an unfailable course and had to re-do it.  
So Colin blasting into Mike’s bar came as a shock to everyone.  
“Where the hell is your good-for-nothing silver tongue of a brother?”  
Mike had never liked spontaneous visits and visits from Loki he liked even less.  
“What?!”  
“Your brother. Anders. Quite short. Blonde. Suspended god of poetry. Where is he?”  
“How should I know that? What the hell do you want from him? He is hardly of any use, now that Axl banished Bragi.”  
Colin ignored the obvious fact that he wasn’t welcome and sat down on a covered chair. “Did he tell you that he was my pr-guy for my campaign? I want to be a mayor. Of course he didn’t tell you. You’re not exactly talking are you? I fired him. I thought some of Bragi’s talent might have stuck with him, but no. I’m not paying that glow-ball for moping all day and being a shadow of his former self. But I kept his assistant. Darla. Dora. Desdemona. Whatever.”  
“Dawn.” Mike frowned. Anders without Dawn? That wouldn’t even work, if Bragi was still with Anders.  
“Yes, that one. Whatever, the reason I’m looking for your brother is money. I had been paying him before I fired him, but all he did was crap so I want my money back. I really like my money. So if he doesn’t give it to me, I’ll take it from one of the other Johnsons.”  
Mike sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Typical. Of course Anders would run away from responsibility. “have you tried contacting him?”  
“Of course. I’ve send him daily e-mails for two weeks and today I looked for him at his office and at his home, but both are deserted. I thought it would be better for all participants if I came here before torching his place.”  
“Good thinking. Don’t worry, I’ll find him and he’ll pay you.”  
Colin nodded and left with a “He’d better.”  
Mike sighed again. When would his brother finally stop bringing everyone bad luck?

\---

“I don’t think that’s a very good idea.”  
“Come on, she has most probably seen him a lot more than we did!”  
“Sure, but I suspect she won’t be that thrilled to see me after… Lance happened.”  
“Please Ty, you have known Dawn the longest.”  
Ty muttered something about killing Anders when he saw him the next time. “Okay, I’ll do it. But I won’t like it. Why don’t you do it?”  
“Do you think I’m excited to clean up Anders’ messes?”  
“Noone does.”

\---

“No I didn’t talk to Anders. Not since I sort of resigned.”  
“You resigned? To work with Colin Gundersen?!”  
“Yeah, I always wanted to do politics and I never wanted to stay with Anders for ever. I just never managed to actually hand in my notice before.” She sounded surprised. “But it was suddenly easy to do it two weeks ago.”  
“So you haven’t seen Anders for two weeks?”  
“No, I haven’t. What’s wrong with him?”  
“Nothing, he owes money to someone. Why would something be wrong with him?”  
“Well, in the last weeks that I’ve been working for him he seemed sort of different…. Sad and …small. That sounds stupid out loud.”  
Ty snorted. “Yeah it sort of does.” He  
could imagine how not being able to rely on Bragi’s powers anymore would upset Anders.  
“Tell him… um… tell him I said hi.”  
“I’ll do that.”

\---

The Johnsons, meaning Ty and Mike, had decided that it would be the best to look for Anders at his own flat.  
They brought several tools to ease breaking into Anders’ flat, after Colin told them the place was deserted.  
Maybe they’d find him in bed with some chick, who knows.  
But they didn’t. The place was deserted, Colin had been right.  
They had searched his bathroom, his bedroom, been through his entire flat and finally sat down in the kitchen, where Mike found a note on the table.  
Ty saw how his face turned white and ashen after reading it.  
“Shit.”  
“What? What does it say.”  
Mike handed him the note. It said: “WE KNOW WHAT HE IS AND WE KNOW THERE ARE MORE OF YOU. BRING YOUR SUPERIOR DEITY OR YOU WILL NEVER SEE THIS ONE AGAIN.”  
Under the text was a detailed description of how to drive to the meeting point, but Ty didn’t have the strength to read on. How could they have been so blind? Anders had probably been gone for two weeks and nobody noticed. Even Ty himself. And the date for the meeting was long expired. What had they been doing to his brother? Was Anders even still alive? He had to sit down.  
“Shit.”


	6. Info

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this isn't an actual chapter, just clearing a few thing up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> spoilery for episode 3x07

omg, I'm a fucking clairvoyant XD  
I KNEW the girls was Saga, oh my god.  
I won't change anything about the story now that Saga is a canon character, you can imagine my Saga as a red-haired, lesbian version of the canon one. and she has not, for obvious reasons, slept with Axl.  
oh my, I'm so bloody flashed right now :DD


End file.
